so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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