Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
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Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
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People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.