D3 body, D1 cock
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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