can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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