I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize