Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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