she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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