Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
