considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
