Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
My vagina is officially offended.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize