I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
