I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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