People with herpes should wear stickers.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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