It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Randomize
