In the future we'll all be gay
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You don't make any sense
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