Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize