ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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