I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
