hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
