Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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