so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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