dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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