If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
