The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
