just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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