THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
