I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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