You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
