Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Everclear isn't food dammit
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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