yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You pole danced in your parka.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.