Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.