using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
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