is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize