so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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