I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
