I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
