i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
