She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
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I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.