An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
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You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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