I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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