Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
