The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize