Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
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I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
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Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I party with great urgency now.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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