Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
