how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
You have to summon your inner elephant
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
