I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
