Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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