4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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