Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i dont even know how to be here
Operation Purity has been aborted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
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