susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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