I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize