I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
